Welcome to Day 11, the finale of this Bully-Proofing Your Child series. Up until now, our focus has been on providing your child with the knowledge and skills to stand up for themselves or recognize when their behavior leans toward bullying and how to change.
The goal for today is to help your child avoid being a bystander and learn to advocate for others who are being bullied.

Children often hesitate to intervene because they fear becoming the next target or simply don’t know what to do. According to Krazeir (2007), child advocates generally want to communicate three messages:

“We do not want to be around those who treat us or others with disrespect.”
“We will report any ongoing bullying that we cannot stop.”
“Bullying is unacceptable everywhere.”

To help your child convey these messages, try role-playing various scenarios and discussing where and when these advocacy skills might be applied in real life. Encourage your child to reflect on what went well and what they found challenging. Above all, help them feel confident. Recognize their progress and highlight their strength whenever they stand up for themselves or someone else.

If your child is reluctant to advocate for others, bring their favorite superhero into the conversation. Ask how they think Wonder Woman, Iron Man, Black Panther, or Captain America would respond to bullying. Tapping into that superhero persona can make it easier for them to see how they can stand up for others. You can also help them imagine their own “invisible armor,” much like Clark Kent wearing his Superman suit under his everyday clothes. These small but imaginative steps can boost your child’s courage and willingness to be an advocate.

Being an advocate for others doesn’t end with showing the bully that their behavior won’t be tolerated. It also involves comforting a friend who has been bullied. Encouraging compassion and empathy reflects the qualities of a good friend and completes the idea of advocacy.

This concludes the Bully-Proofing Your Child series. Thank you for reading each article. I hope you’ve found the information valuable in supporting your child—whether they’ve been a target or engaged in bullying.

Are you worried you child is engaging in bully type behaviour and don’t know how to prevent it? Are you concerned your child has become a target? Are you wanting to enhance your child’s ability to be assertive and stand up for themselves, or learn how to be assertive without being aggressive? If so, the team at Eckert Psychology & Education Centre is here to guide you and your child on your journey towards assertiveness. Book your initial intake appointment today at www.eckertcentre.com and click the “Book an Appointment” button. You can also email us at info@eckert-psychology.com for more information. Remember, psychology services are covered by most extended health insurance plans.

Kymberley is a Registered Psychologist at Eckert Psychology & Education Centre. In her role, Kymberley provides counseling services for children and youth, parent support counselling, and counselling service for adults with developmental delays. Kymberley is an EMDR-Child Specialist whose practice is Theraplay informed. Kymberley is further trained in attachment-based counselling for children and parents, trauma, and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). Kymberley’s passion is working with children and those that love them. She believes in their incredible capacity to be resilient when life asks difficult things from them.

References:
Krazier, S. (2007). 10 Days to a Bully-Proof Child: The Proven Program to Build Confidence and Stop Bullies for Good. New York, NY: Marlowe & Company.